BLT short tales
by Stran9eChild
Summary: Just some stories about Blue and Lord Tourettes from Dick Figures. Yes I ship Blue and Lord Tourettes. Sue me.


_Authors Note: Sometimes the characters might Seem OCish, and I don't really care if anyone likes it or not, I just wrote this up because it bothered me that there was no LTXBlue stuff up here :oI _

**~ Terrified ~**

To be completely honest, the idea scared the fuck out of Blue. He sat in the hospital waiting room, not sure if he was ready for this. Not sure what he would do if the test came back positive. Would he be able to stay with Lord Tourettes or would he not be able to handle it.

He didn't want to leave Lord Tourettes to face it alone, but Blue wasn't sure if he could take it. The door open and Lord Tourettes came out, followed by the doctor. Blue stood up, trying to read his boyfriend. Lord Tourettes head was low, his green hair covering his eyes.

" Whats the result," Blue asked, his heart pounding. The doctor sighed and removed his glasses in a dramatic way

" Well sir, I have good news and Bad news which do you want to hear first?" He asked. Blue swallowed.

" B-Bad . . " Blue said. The Doctor hummed.

" Well there's nothing more I can do for him . . ." the doctor said. Blue felt his heart sink, " That's the bad news the good news is," Lord Tourettes's shoulders started shaking, Blue reached over and placed a hand on his shoulder to comfort him, " It's just a stomach bug," The doctor said, a grin breaking across his face. Blue felt like time had stopped.

" wha-" He was cut off by a loud laugh from his boyfriend. His shoulders still shaking in what Blue had assumed was silent crying turned out to be laughter.

" It's just a stomach bug, the reason the vomit was red probably had to do with the uh . . . animal blood he consumed," He said the last part like it was a question. Blue didn't react, " Right but he's fine . . ." The doctor finished. Blue still didn't react. Lord Tourettes looked up at him.

" Blue?" Blue released Lord Tourettes and turned. Walking away. Lord Tourettes watched him go, " Blue?!" He called, starting to run after him. It wasn't until they reached the hospital lobby did Lord Tourettes grab Blue's arm and made him turn to face him, " Blue whats wrong?" Blue looked down at Lord Tourettes, then closed his blue eyes, sighing. He pressed his fingers together in a preying sort of way and brought it to his lips. Taking a deep breath. He then laced his fingers together, using both pointer fingers to point at Lord Tourettes.

" You think that was funny," Blue asked. Lord Tourettes smiled a little.

" Well yeah, it was COCK-pjjhi" Blue covered Lord Tourettes's mouth with his hand.

" You thought that was funny," Blue continued, Lord Tourettes gave him a confused look, his moth still covered, " Do you have the slightest idea how scared I was? I thought you were sick, I thought you were dying, then you and you're stupid doctor come out and pull that shit? That's not funny." Blue snapped, " that's a joke you use when you get a promotion or birthday! NOT YOU'RE FUCKING LIFE," Blue shouted. Lord Tourettes stared at him in shock. Blue pulled his hand away and started for the door again, " It wasn't funny," Blue shouted over his shoulder. Lord Tourettes stood there for a while, staring at the ground before running after Blue.

" Blue wait I'm FUCKING sorry!"

**~ Sunshine ~**

Lord Tourettes was shaking with fear, the nightmare had terrified him. He shakily reached over and picked up his cell phone. Dialing a number and hugging his knees to his chest. That was the problem with his syndrome. Sure he made it work for him, but the tourettes also fucked with his dreams. At night it was like two different people were in his head. One wanted him to kill everything and everyone, the other didn't.

" Hello?" A sleepy voice answered. Lord Tourettes hesitantly spoke.

" Blue . . " He whimpered. There was a sigh, and a curse.

" Nightmare again?" He asked. Lord Tourettes nodded, humming. Blue sighed again, " alright put me on speaker," Blue said softly. Lord Tourettes obeyed and put the phone back on the bed side table, " Ready?" Blue asked. Lord Tourettes snuggled into his blankets, his head on sinking into the pillow.

" Yes. . . " He said after a couple minutes. Blue groaned a little, Lord Tourettes could hear doors opening.

" sorry, one sec, I'm just making sure Red isn't awake, I'd still do it, I just would rather he be asleep . . . okay he's asleep. ug, can't believe . . . You are my sunshine," Blue sang. Lord Tourettes smiled and let his eyes drift shut, " My only sunshine, you make me happy, when skies are grey, you'll never know dear, how much I love you, please don't take my sunshine away," Blue finished, there was a pause," Are you still awake," Blue asked. Lord Tourettes hummed, Blue sighed, " You are my sunshine," Blue started again. This time the words just muddled together as Lord Tourettes started to drift off.

" Please don't take my sunshine away," Blue finished for a second time, sitting on the couch, slouched foreword, " You alseep now?" He asked. There was no reply. Blue smiled, " Good, love you," He said before he hung up, putting the phone back on the charger. He heard a snicker and looked up to see Red in the kitchen, holding a beer.

" singing your boytoy to sleep again?" He asked. Blue glared sleepily at him.

" Shut up Red."

**~ Love ~**

" Hey Blue are you sure you know what love is," Red asked. Once again they were on a quest. Blue sat across from him on in the tain compartment.

" What do you mean?" Blue asked. Red leaned foreword a little.

" You know I don't care that you're gay, or bi...or what ever, I mean I'll give you shit for it cuz I'm me, but you said you loved Pink, and now you say you Love the little green man, I have to wonder . . . are you sure you know what love is," Red asked. Blue was silent at first. Leaning foreword a little.

" Yes. I did love Pink but now I don' t. . . now I love Lord Tourettes, It's a little different this time, but it's still love," Blue explained. Red hummed.

" So. . . Love IS a boner?, " Red said. Blue gave him an exasperated look.

" Yes. Love is a boner Red," Blue said evenly. Red leaned back his hands in the air.

" I KNEW IT!" He cried.

**~ Broken record ~**

it laid shattered on the ground. Lord Tourettes slowly looked up at Red who was still holding the record case. He slowly held it out to Lord Tourettes, who took it numbly. Looking down at the case.

" right well . . . see ya!" Red said, making a break for the door. Lord Tourettes just stared at the record case as the door slammed shut behind Red.

Blue would be home any second and Lord Tourettes had been partially to blame to the broken remains of the limited edition record recording of the Star Wars sound track. Lord Tourettes knew how much this record cost. He had been the one who bought it in the first place, it was Blue's birthday present. There was a click as the door opened again.

" Blue don't go in there!" Red's voice shouted. Lord Tourettes looked up in time to see his blue haired boyfriend attempt to kick Red from his ankles.

" What are you talking abo-" Blue looked up at Lord Tourettes. His voice trialed off, " Lord Tourettes?" Blue called, Red released him, allowing Blue to slowly approach him, " LT, baby," Blue cooed, reaching out to him, " Why are you crying?" Was he crying? Lord Tourettes, wiped his eyes and found he was crying. He stared at his hand, then broke into a loud uncontrollable sob. Falling to his knees.

Blue made to rush to his side when there was a loud crunch. Both Blue and Lord Tourettes looked down to the floor. Blue was stepping on the broken Record parts. Blue took his foot off the shard, kneeling in front of it. Trying to find a sign of what record it was.

" oh god, please tell me this wasn't your sounds of nature record," Blue said in a panicked voice. Lord Tourettes shook his head.

" n-No I- I sold that," Lord Tourettes cried. Blue looked up and gave him a shocked look.

" Why would you do that? You loved that record! " Blue exclaimed. Lord Tourettes sobbed louder and his face in his hands.

" I sold all my records, A-And my FUCKING record player, and my lute and m-my FUCK!" Lord Tourettes sobbed.

" what? why?" Blue asked. Lord Tourettes held up the record cover. Blue took it and read the title, " W-was this for me?" Blue asked. Lord Tourettes nodded. Blue blinked and set the cover down. He scooted closed to Lord Tourettes, and pulled the green haired man into a hug, " Hey, it's okay, don't cry," He cooed. Lord Tourettes sobbed and hid his face, every now and then shouting 'Fuck' or 'Ass'.

" B-But I-I wanted to g-get you something FUCKING amazing a-and it's broken," Lord Tourettes sobbed. Blue removed Lord Tourettes's green hat from the top of his head, and set it on the ground beside them. He then ran his fingers through his green hair with one hand, rubbing circles into Lord Tourettes's back with the other.

" Shhh, it's just a record, it's okay, I don't need it, calm down," Blue cooed. Lord Tourettes slowly relaxed. The sobs subsiding, " And I'll get your stuff back, don't worry," Blue said softly. Lord Tourettes nodded.

**~ Lullaby and Goodnight ~**

" Pleeeeeeeease, " Lord Tourettes pleaded, nuzzling his head into Blue's arm. Blue rolled over in his sleeping bag so his back was to Lord Tourettes.

" No. NO no no," Blue said evenly, " You did not have a nightmare I am not singing," Blue snapped. Lord Tourettes lifted his head and put it on Blue's shoulder. Giving him puppy eyes, " I live with Red who keeps Kitty amazing in a shoe box, you're gonna have to do better than that," Blue said evenly. Lord Tourettes raised an eyebrow and sat up, looking towards the tent entrance where the others were still drinking.

Blue had wanted to go to bed to do Camp related things and Lord Tourettes had joined him so he wasn't alone in the morning. Lord Tourettes turned back to Blue with a confident smirk. Blues eyes went wide.

" You wouldn't!" Blue gasped. Lord Tourettes pouted, and started get glassy eyes. A loud long whine slipped from Lord Tourettes mouth. His crocodile tears slipping from his eyes. The party went silent.

" Whats going on in there," Pink called. Blue grabbed Lord Tourettes's arm.

" LT I am begging you do not do this," Blue said. Lord Tourettes raised an eyebrow, " I am not singing," Blue said through gritted teeth. Lord Tourettes put the crying face back on and opened the tent flap, running out, crying. Blue cursed, following his boyfriend. Lord Tourettes was crying on Pink's shoulder.

" Blue what is wrong with you," Pink snapped, no one saw Lord Tourettes send Blue a evil smirk. Blue groaned.

" Oh come on, he's faking it!" Blue exclaimed, " I'm not singing him to sleep, I only do that when he has nightmares! " Blue exclaimed. Broseph broke into a laugh.

" You sing him to sleep?" He asked, " Bro . . " He was still laughing. Trollz started laughing too.

" Wow and people think I'm sad," He said laughing. Lord Tourettes pulled away from Pink.

" Green man pathetic," Raccoon laughed. Lord Tourettes looked down at his feet, blush starting to creep to his face. Blue clenched his fist. walking up to the group, standing beside Red.

" Bro you need to get a li-" BANG. A bullet hole suddenly appeared on the douche bag's face. Pink gasped, and ran over to Broseph.

" Jesus! RED!" she snapped. Red didn't respond. He was staring at Blue who was holding Red's gun. The whole group gaped.

" Anyone else wanna comment?" Blue asked. Everyone shook their heads.

" Well actually I-" Red started but Blue turned to him, glaring daggers. Red pulled his baseball cap over his face, " Never mind," Red mumbled. Blue reached over and grabbed Lord Tourettes's arm, dragging him to the tent.

" Blue listen, I- I'm-" Lord Tourettes's stuttered. Blue zipped the tent shut.

" Don't worry about it," Blue said evenly, tucking himself into the sleeping bag. Lord Tourettes hesitantly tucked himself into his sleeping back, and turned his back to Blue. afraid to say anything to his boyfriend, " Some Where," Blue started to sing softly. Lord Tourettes slowly turned to face Blue, " Over the rainbow, way up high," Blue sang, arm stretched out in an inviting way. Lord Tourettes hesitantly snuggled into Blue's shoulder, letting Blue wrap an arm around him.

" There's a land that I heard of once, in a lullaby," Lord Tourettes smiled, and closed his eyes, " Some where over the rain bow, skies are blue, and the dreams that you dare to dream really do come true . . ."

**~ Loss ~ **

Blue started to rip through his room to find it. Lord Tourettes sighed and leaned against the door frame. He was fairly certain Blue's Kirk figurine wasn't here but Blue helped him find his hat, it was the least he could do.

" Where the fuck could it have gone?!" Blue exclaimed. Lord Tourettes heard a faint giggling from the living room and looked back in time to see Red duck back into his room. Lord Tourettes pushed himself away from the door and approached Red's room, carefully opening the door. Sure enough, the figurine sat atop a porn magazine pile.

Lord Tourettes decided that he would rather buy Blue a new one instead of trying to save the mess Red had encased it in. . .

**~ Promises ~**

Blue was just starting to think this game was bull shit. Everyone said it was scary. It wasn't Blue clicked a few buttons, yawning a little.

Lord Tourettes opened yet another box, he lost a bet and had to unpack three of Blue's things for him. Blue had moved in with Lord Tourettes and so far it's gone so well.

" ARRRRRRG!" the sudden cry made Lord Tourettes jump, and look towards the bedroom.

" Blue?" He called. There was a loud bang. Lord Tourettes made his way to the bedroom. The room was a horrible mess. The computer screen flicker a GAME OVER. The chair was knocked over, papers lay scattered across the room. Lord Tourettes slowly aproached the closet and pulled the door open. Blue sat curled in the corner, rocking back and forth. His eyes wide and distant. Lord Tourettes knelt down in front of Blue.

" Blue?" Lord Tourettes called. Blue looked up at him, " What happened?" He asked. Blue blinked.

" I-It came out of no where," Blue whispered, " I-It just came out of fucking no where," Blue hid his face in his knees. Lord Tourettes raised an eyebrow, leaned back a little so he could look at the computer. Lord Tourettes rolled his eyes and stood up, making his way to the computer, he hit the power button and the whole system shut down.

" There, the BITCH is gone," Lord Tourettes said, gesturing to the computer. Blue peeked out of the closet to see the computer, " I'm going to finish that last box I have to do," he continued, leaving the room.

Clearly turning the game off did not help. In the slightest. Blue would jump at every sound, and wouldn't stay in a room by himself for more than five minutes. Hell he wouldn't go to the bathroom unless he knew Lord Tourettes was on the other side of the door.

" Blue don't you think this is going too far?" Lord Tourettes asked, flipping through the magazine that they kept by the toilet. Blue peeked around the shower curtain.

" . . . no," Blue said quietly. Lord Tourettes looked up at him with an exasperated look, " It could get me," Blue mumbled. Lord Tourettes groaned.

" Blue It's a FUCKING game character!" He snapped. Blue ducked behind the curtain as if that would spair him from Lord Tourettes wrath. Lord Tourettes sighed and opened his magazine again. It only got worst from there. There was screaming at night and panic. Blue wouldn't even use the computer, as if she'd be waiting for him.

Lord Tourettes got particularly tired of it about a month later. He had been dreaming of picking hundreds of daisies when his dream was interrupted by the usual scream.

" No! NO NO NO!" Blue cried. Lord Tourettes growled and sat up, turning to look at Blue.

" BLUE!" Lord Tourettes shouted. Blue gasped and looked over at Lord Tourettes, " Again?!" He snapped. Climbing out of the bed, " Jesus FUCKING CHRIST! I am never going to get sleep in here," He shouted. Blue sat up.

" W-Where are you going?" Blue asked. Lord Tourettes turned to him, pausing at the door.

" To sleep of the FUCKING couch," he said, " this," he gestured to Blue, " needs to STOP." Blue winced and hugged the blankets close to him.

" Wait!" he cried out. Lord Tourettes paused, " I-I-I'm scared okay . . " he wasn't really admitting anything he was stating the obvious.

" I know that," Lord Tourettes said even, " But of what?" Blue looked back at the computer.

" You try playing it, you'll see!" Blue insisted. Lord Tourettes sighed and turned to the computer.

" If I play your FUCKING game this will stop," again Lord Tourettes gestured to Blue. Blue hesitantly nodded. It was an empty promise, they both knew that, but Lord Tourettes turned on the computer anyway, and slid into the chair, sleepily starting the game. It was called, Snatcher.

It started off pretty Game asked for your full name, and you played as character that was simply trying to locate a missing wife, while his daughter followed. As he played there were puzzles, then plot twists. Like the wife was fine, or that the reason she was missing was because she was cheating on you.

Lord Tourettes sighed and continued playing. The snatcher seemed to be trying to take things that mattered to you, and the point of the game was to collect the things and get them all in the same room so you wouldn't lose them.

Lord Tourettes was positive he had all the things when there was a loud scream in the game. Blue squeaked and ducked under the covers. Lord Tourettes followed the scream. It lead to the daughters bedroom. She was dead on the floor with a teddy bear beside her. Lord Tourettes wasn't too surprised by that, he went back to the other room and found his other things missing as well.

" Oooh surprise surprise Snatcher wins," Lord Tourettes grumbled. Blue whimpered. Lord Tourettes made to leave the room when there was a flash of red and Lord Tourettes was looking at a red eyed beast. In they eyes of the beast was an image of . . . Blue. Blood red Lettering scrolled across the bottom of the screen.

YOU'RE NEXT LORD TOURETTES. Then the screen went black, and there was a generic loud scream that could be easily mistaken for anybodies, and at the moment it sounded so much like Blue it made Lord Tourettes's blood run cold.

" Y- You see?" Blue whimpered. Lord Tourettes silently nodded, " I swear to got i-if that thing took you I-" Blue was cut off by Lord Tourettes.

" Me? Why would it take me?" Lord Tourettes asked. Blue pointed at the screen.

" YOU SAW WHY! IT TAKES WHATS THEY CARE ABOUT MOST!" Blue practically shouted. Lord Tourettes stared at him for a moment.

" I-I'm what you care about most?" He asked. Blue gave him an exasperated look.

" WHAT DID YOU THINK THE THING I CARED ABOUT MOST WAS?! MY SHIRT?!" Blue exclaimed in a panic. Lord Tourettes stood up.

" Hey, Blue you need to calm THE FUCK down," Lord Tourettes said softly. Blue nodded, " See I'm right here right? and Snatchers aren't real," Lord Tourettes said. Blue nodded.

" Y-You're not going anywhere?" Blue asked. Lord Tourettes shook his head, " You promise?" Lord Tourettes smiled.

" Yes, I Promise,"

**~ Heroes and Zeros ~**

" Batman you rock!"

" Thank you Batman for saving us again!" Blue sighed and crossed his arms, leaning back against the office building as "Batman" got all the praise. He didn't even DO anything this time. Blue cursed, and tugged at his cape, it was probably for the best that he didn't get praise. He was the worlds most depressing superhero.

He wouldn't be aloud to take Praise very well.

Blue started home, or at east to a near by alley where he could change out of this damn costume. All the tights were starting to itch. He turned a corner and was about to pull off his mask when he heard a voice.

" Bloser? " Blue snapped back up in time to see Lord Tourettes turn into the alley. He paused a few feet away from him, almost in a shy way. Blue wasn't use to that, but then again Lord Tourettes didn't know he was talking to Blue. He was talking to the Bloser, " H-Hi MOTHER FUCKER," Lord Tourettes covered his mouth,looking mortified. Blue almost broke character and laughed. But he didn't.

" Hello Lord Tourettes," Blue greeted. Lord Tourettes gasped.

" Y-You know my name?" He asked. Blue nodded, " How," That made Blue stop.

" Oh well. . . I see you all the time," Blue explained, it wasn't a lie. Lord Tourettes blushed.

" I-I didn't think you'd remember me," He said, looking away. Blue hadn't noticed he was taking steps closer to Lord Tourettes, " Out of all COCKSUCKERS," Again Lord Tourettes covered his mouth, " That you save," He finished. Blue smirked.

" You are a hard person to forget about, Beside " Batman" does all the saving," Blue said sarcastically, stepping closer. Lord Tourettes blushed a deeper shade of red.

" I- I just wanted to say thank you," Lord Tourettes said softly. Blue reached down and gently ran his fingers along the edge of Lord Tourettes's hair, tucking a stray strand behind his ear. Lord Tourettes's hair was getting long, Blue decided he needed as hair cut but that could be dealt with later.

" No problem," Blue said. Lord Tourettes's smile blush got even darker, he took a step back.

" I-I'm sorry, I have a boyfriend- I should go," He stuttered. Blue raised an eyebrow, watching Lord Tourettes scramble away. Blue pulled off his mask when he was sure Lord Tourettes was gone.

" So do I . . ." He said smirking. Blue didn't notice that on top of one of the buildings he was hiding between Earl Grey leaned over the edge, a grin breaking across his face.

" Interesting," he said sipping from his tea, " Butlers?" One of the many butlers came foreword, " Do look into Mr. Tourettes will you? I want to be sure I'm right before I make my next move," He said, straightening up. The butler nodded.

" Right away sir," The butler said with a bow. Earl Grey grinned.

" Thank you,"

**~ Wishes~**

" OH how could I not FUCKING see it before!" Lord Tourettes shouted, " you compare me to her all the time! Why wouldn't you FUCK THAT STUPID BITCH!" Blue groaned and hid his face in his hands.

" I never said you had to be like Pink! I never slept with Pink!" Blue snapped. Lord Tourettes picked up a small teacup with Superman's logo. He held it, then threw it at the wall as hard as he could. Blue gaped, " HOLY SHIT ARE YOU INSANE!" Blue snapped. Lord Tourettes picked up another cup.

" Why do you think she's Better than me?!" Lord Tourettes shouted. Blue looked around the room helplessly.

" I DON'T!" He finally shouted, " did I ask Pink to move in with me? Did I agree to move in with Pink?! No!" Blue exclaimed. Lord Tourettes threw the cup. Blue flinched as it shattered against the wall. Lord Tourettes then picked up a teapot, " Wait, Lord Tourettes just just wait," Blue said softly. Lord Tourettes paused looking from the pot to Blue, " We can talk this out, just put the pot back on the shelf," Blue said as calmly as he could. Lord Tourettes didn't move.

" Do you still love her?" Lord Tourettes asked. Blue groaned.

" NO! Jesus, just put the pot down!" Blue snapped. Lord Tourettes looked down at the pot.

" Did that BITCH give this to you?!" He asked suddenly, Blue's eyes went wide.

" NO! no Fluffers gave it to me, technically," He added with a shrug. Lord Tourettes raised an eyebrow.

" Fluffers?! The Hamster that FUCKING died?" Lord Tourettes snapped, Blue sheepishly nodded. Lord Tourettes looked down at the pot. It looked oddly familiar

" Please put the pot down," Blue said, taking a step closer. Lord Tourettes looked up and calmly let the pot go. Causing it to fall and shatter on the ground.

" oops," he said evenly. Blue hands went into his hair. A purple fog started to fill the room and a giant hamster appeared before him, "oooooh it was that teapot," Lord Tourettes noted out loud. Blue glared at him.

" Yo! Waddup! I can talk again that Waddup!" The Hamster said, " Now which on of you mofo's broke the pot?" he asked. Blue pointed at Lord Tourettes, " Alright green man you get a wish for setting me free," He said. Lord Tourettes blinked.

" I-I get a wish, anything," Lord Tourettes asked. Blue shifted nervously. The hamster nodded.

" Just don't waste it on Donkey shit this time," he said. Both Blue and Lord Tourettes shuddered at the memory.

" I-I wish . ." he glanced over at Blue who was watching him with a scared look, " I Wish HE" He pointed at Blue, " Never met Pink," He snapped. Blue's eyes went wide.

" But Lord Tourettes if I don't meet Pink I-" Blue was cut off by the hamster.

" Wish granted BOOM" There was a puff of Purple smoke, sending Lord Tourettes into a coughing fit. He striaghtened up once the fit had passed and noticed his house seemed. . . empty.

Lord Tourettes hummed, and stepped outside. It was nice out. The sun was shining, all of the flowers outside were green, which was odd. Lord Tourettes could have sworn he had planted some blue flowers. Lord Tourettes shrugged and picked up his lute and made his way to his stump just outside the woods. Strumming at the cords.

" Then I said, if you think Next gen is so great you can go to hell," Lord Tourettes looked up and grinned.

" Dude I don't care," Red said as he and Blue walked by.

" BLUE!" Lord Tourettes set his lute down and ran over to Blue, jumping on him. Blue jumped, then stood there awkwardly. Lord Tourettes pulled away grinning. Blue was a faint shade of pink and he looked over at Red then back at Lord Tourettes.

" Um . . . Do I know you?" Blue asked. Lord Tourettes's smile faded.

" What do you mean, do you know me? COCKSUCKER," He spazzed, Blue jumped back in surprise. Red laughed.

" Dude I think that's Lord Tourettes of the SHIT PISS FART woods," Red said, pointing at Lord Tourettes. Blue nodded.

" Ah, well . . . it's nice to meet you, Lord Tourettes," Blue said. Lord Tourettes stared at him.

" But we already met each other FUCKER," Lord Tourettes argued. Blue laughed weakly.

" I think I would remember if I met you man," Blue said, as he took a step away, " I got to go, uh bye," Lord Tourettes watched Red and Blue go.

" Dude I think he likes you," Red teased. Blue elbowed Red.

" Shut up Red, I'm not gay," Blue snapped back. Lord Tourettes stood in shock.

" Blue?" His voice cracked. Confusion filled him. He didn't understand, " What happened?" He asked.

" I'll tell you whata happened," A voice said, Lord Tourettes turned to see Raccoon behind him, " You fucked up," He said.

" So what you're telling me is," Lord Tourettes said, holding his hat after an hour, " If Blue never met Pink he never takes Pink on the second date, so he never meets me, because he was never on that quest where he had to save Pink?" Lord Tourettes asked. Raccoon nodded, " well . . how do I fix it," He asked. Raccoon gestured for Lord Tourettes to follow.

" I hava time machine, I am going to send you back to when Blue was suppose to meet Pink," Raccoon said, " You have to make sure it happens," Lord Tourettes sighed.

" Couldn't I just make Blue meet me when he's suppose to?" Lord Tourettes asked, adjusting his hand back on his head. Raccoon stared at him.

"No." He said. Pulling Lord Tourettes into his store. He pushed Lord Tourettes into the metal box and shut the door behind him, " The Red and Blue ones already destroyed my old time machine but I hava this one, this one I can decide how far back you go, ready?" Raccoon asked. Lord Tourettes shifted.

" Uh . . actually couldn't I just start over with-"

" Too late," There was aloud beep and Lord Tourettes was slammed into the wall, it felt like gravity was against him at the moment, there was a crash. The door slowly slid open, Lord Tourettes cried out in surprise.

Bullet were flying every where. Lord Tourettes was about to step out when there was a crash and a figure fell through the ceiling and to the ground. A second figure fell in through the hole with a parachute. Lord Tourettes shut the door a little so he couldn't be seen.

" Oh shit IT'S A TRAP!" One shouted, Lord Tourettes peeked out, recognizing the one that shouted. Blue and Red ran off to take cover.

" I THINK THEY'RE FUCKING HACKING!" Red shouted. Lord Tourettes darted out from his hiding spot to follow Blue and Red. They ducked behind some sand bags, Lord Tourettes hid behind some shelves not too far from them.

" Activate Day vision goggles," Red said seriously. Lord Tourettes raised an eyebrow and peeked around the corner to see what the hell Red was talking about.

" Those are binoculars." Blue said dully. Lord Tourettes covered his mouth to keep from laughing. Red ignored Blue.

" Target acquired," Red said, showing Blue the binoculars. Lord Tourettes sighed and darted off to find Pink. There was still something Else he needed to do once Pink met Blue.

Lord Tourettes looked from Blue to the Gene. Lord Tourettes glared.

" I wish he-" The was a loud bang and all eyes flew to the door. Blue gasped. Lord Tourettes blinked in surprise.

" WHAT THE FUCK?!" Blue cried, in the door frame was a messy, tired Lord Tourettes. He pointed at the Gene.

" I WISH THE TEAPOT WAS FIXED AND THAT IS WAS GONE!" He shouted. The gene hummed.

" Sorry Bro, he's technically you, see ya!" There was a puff of Purple smoke and the Teapot rebuilt it self and vanished. Lord Tourettes looked up at his double who faded from reality

" What the fuck?"

**~ Double or nothing ~**

" Fuuuuck I'm out," Red groaned, tucking his and Blue's wallet away. Raccoon grumbled.

" I'mma out too," He said.

" Bro I got-" Broseph started but was cut off by a gunshot. Red had shot him again.

" He's out," Red said calmly. No one reacted.

" Out," Mr. Jinkins said. Everyone turned to Blue and Lord Tourettes. Lord Tourettes had just placed a hudred dollars in the center. Blue smirked.

" I'm still in," Blue said. Red laughed.

" Man I've been playing with your money what do you have to bet?" Red asked. Blue glanced at him, then looked over at Lord Tourettes, he reached into his pocket and dropped a blank pink card in the center of the table. Lord Tourettes stared at it.

" What is that?" Raccoon asked. Lord Tourettes looked back up at Blue, who winked.

" He knows what it is," Blue said, " So we playing or what?" Lord Tourettes picked up his cards shakily, not taking his gaze off of Blue. Blue looked down at his cards, then looked back up at Lord Tourettes. His smirk got bigger. His eyes glinting in a devious way. Lord Tourettes turned pink and hid his face in his cards.

" Six Diamonds," Lord Tourettes said putting the cards down for him to see. Blue grinned, Lord Tourettes face paled.

" Royal Flush," Blue said with a purr in his voice.

" HOLY SHIT!" Red exclaimed, " What the fuck did he just win?!" Red asked. Lord Tourettes didn't answer, he did however lean over the table.

" That was only suppose to be used when it was just US playing," Lord Tourettes hissed. Blue grinned.

" But it was just us," Blue teased. Lord Tourettes's eyes narrowed.

" WHAT DID HE WIN!" Red asked louder. Blue leaned back.

" Lets just say we have a stop to make on the way home," He said, winking at Lord Tourettes. Who was bright red and shaking a little. Lord Tourettes gave Blue a pleading look. Blue wasn't budging.

**~ Secrecy ~**

Lord Tourettes cried out in fear his body shaking as Earl Grey approached him. Lord Tourettes was bound and Gagged. His limbs starting to ache from being suspended over the floor.

" You are just so . . ." He paused, " I want to say precious but you're not, I honestly don't see what he sees in you," He said. Lord Tourettes struggled against the binds, only to scream in pain as electricity coursed through him.

" Yeah, you might not want to do that, I rigged it with exposed wires, even when he shows up to save you, you'll get electrocuted if he tries to remove you from the ropes," At that moment the wall exploded. Batman and The Bloser came running in.

" HAHA we got you now! " Batman shouted. Earl Grey laughed.

" Oh I don't think so," He said, " I know who you are," He said pointing between the two, " and I know your," he pointed at Bloser, " Weak spot, " he gestured to Lord Tourettes. The Bloser gaped.

" Lord Tourettes," He mouthed. Batman played dumb.

" What?! We don't know that loser!" He shouted. Lord Tourettes made a muffled cry, " Don't know him," He confimed. Earl Grey rolled his eyes.

" Cut the act 'Red' " He said, Lord Tourettes eyes went wide, " and Blue if you don't want your boytoy over there to get hurt you better listen closely," He finished. Bloser let his fighting stance fall in a defeated way. Lord Tourettes gave a muffled cry of shock, " Demand one, remove your masks," Earl Grey commanded. Batman shook his head.

" We don't know him," Batman insisted. Bloser sighed.

" Red, I can't do it, he's my boyfriend," Bloser said softly, pulling his mask off. Blue looked over at them, reaching over and pulling Batman's mask, revealing Red.

" Damn it Blue!" Red snapped. Earl Grey laughed.

" Now, Blue, I want you to come here and take this," He said holding out a gun. Lord Tourettes didn't like the look of this. Blue obeyed, picking up the gun, " Good, now put the gun in your mouth," He said. Blue's eyes went wide. Lord Tourettes made a muffled scream, shaking his head. Blue glanced up at him, then sighed, putting the barrel of the gun in his mouth.

" Pull the trigger," He ordered. Blue hesitantly looked back at Lord Tourettes. Who struggled against his binds sending electricity through him. Blue pulled the gun out of his mouth.

" LORD TOURETTES!" Blue cried, reaching out for him, Earl Grey grabbed him and took the gun from Blue, pointing it at Lord Tourettes's head.

" Ah ah ah," Earl Grey taunted, " We wouldn't want me to accidentally," He lowered the gun to Lord Tourettes's torso and pulled the trigger. Lord Tourettes cried out in pain. Muffled behind the gag, his eyes squeezed shut. There was another gunshot. Lord Tourettes opened his eyes and found Earl Grey on the floor, Blue on top of him, the side of his head bleeding.

" HOW DO I GET HIM DOWN," Blue shouted. Earl Grey looked terrified and looked back at Red who was leaning against the wall casually.

" Hey man you brought the little green man into this, you fucked up," Red said evenly. Blue clicked the gun and pressed it between Earl Grey's legs.

" How." He said in a growl, " do I cut him down?" Blue finished. Earl Grey swallowed.

" Lever on the wall turns off the electricity, just cut him down after," He squeaked. Blue smiled evilly.

" see that wasn't that hard," Blue said softly, then he pulled the trigger. Earl Grey didn't even cry out, he just gasped, and fainted.

Blue stood up and made his way to the lever, turning off the electricity. He then approached Lord Tourettes cautiously.

" Hey, a-are you okay?" Blue asked, Lord Tourettes made a muffled response but he didn't make sense. Blue pulled the gag out of his mouth, " Repeat that," Lord Tourettes took a deep breath.

" AM I FUCKING OKAY?!" He cried, " I WAS JUST SHOT! AND ELECTROCUTED AND YOU'RE THE BLOSER?!"Lord Tourettes stared at him, " You're the bloser . . . holy SHIT." Lord Tourettes stared in shock, then flinched suddenly crying out in pain. Blue reached up and cut Lord Tourettes down, pulling him down to the ground, and untying the ropes around his limbs.

" Hey, just keep calm, " Blue said, examining the bullet wound, " You're going to be okay," Blue promised. Lord Tourettes just stared ahead of him. It hurt a lot now that the shock from everything was gone. He didn't know how he had moved before. Blue pressed down on the wound, making Lord Tourettes cry out.

" AHHAHAAAH! God it fucking hurts!" He cried, without spazing. Blue sent him a worried look.

" You're going to be fine, hang in there," Blue pleaded, Lord Tourettes gazed at Blue.

" Y-You're t-the fucking Bloser?" Lord Tourettes said before he drifted off.

**~ Hello ~**

Lord Tourettes groaned and forced his eyes open, he was staring at a white ceiling.

" You okay?" A voice asked. Lord Tourettes looked over to see Red leaning against the door frame of his room, " They say that you took a shot from Earl Grey but Batman and Bloser saved your ass," He said grumpily. Lord Tourettes slowly pushed himself up into a sitting position.

" What the FUCK are you doing here?" Lord Tourettes asked. Red shrugged.

" Fuckin nurses, Blue's my ride and he hasn't left since he got here two days ago," Red said gesturing to the other side of the room. Lord Tourettes followed his gaze and found Blue asleep in a arm chair beside the hospital bed. His chest rising and falling, " look for my sake and Blue's don't ever scare him like that again," Red said evenly, turning, " Oh and one more thing, " he turned back. " HEY BLUE!" he shouted as loud as he could. Blue jumped awake

" I SWEAR I DIDN'T TAKE THE LOLLy wha?" Blue said sleepily. Red rolled his eyes.

" You're man's awake bitch," Red said before leaving the room. Blue looked over at Lord Tourettes who smiled weakly.

" Hi?" Lord Tourettes said quietly. Blue stood up and took Lord Tourettes's hand.

" Hi, are you okay?" Blue asked, kneeling beside the bed. Lord Tourettes swallowed.

" I'm fine," He said, Blue raised an eyebrow.

" Right well, you're alive so I guess that'll do for now," Blue said, leaning over and kissing Lord Tourettes's forhead.

**~ Fever ~**

" For the last time I am not sick!" Blue insisted as he sat in the waiting room of the hospital. Lord Tourettes ignored him, flipping through a magazine.

" Ooooh! A recipe for fried COCK," Lord Tourettes covered his mouth, and looked up to find people staring at him. Blue sighed.

" He means rooster people, go back to what ever you were doing," Blue said loudly, slouching in his seat, " Lord Tourettes can we PLEASE go home," Blue pleaded. Lord Tourettes, reached up and placed the back of his hand on Blue's forehead.

" No, You're still burning up" he said simply turning back to the magazine. Blue groaned.

" Blue?" a voice called Blue sighed and made to stand up but he fell back in his seat. Lord Tourettes gave him a concern look.

" Blue?" Lord Tourettes started, " Are you okay," Blue shook his head slowly the nurse approached them. She grabbed Blue's arm and pulled him to his feet. Blue sent Lord Tourettes a sad look before allowing the nurse to drag him away.

Lord Tourettes watched him go then, turned back to the magazine. It wasn't too long before the nurse returned.

" ?" she asked, Lord Tourettes stood up, " We think he has a bug, he'll be fine," She said, " He will need help home," She finished, " You're a close friend of his?" She asked. Lord Tourettes raised an eyebrow.

" I'm his boyfriend," He said. The nurse gave him a surprised look.

" Oh . . . well," she swallowed, " I pegged you as that type but him?" She said, gestured to the office door. Lord Tourettes's eyes narrowed.

" What is THAT suppose to mean?" He asked. The nurse shrugged.

" well I mean you're just obviously so . . . gay but Blue in there, he's not the sort, actually it's a real shame he's a fag, hate to see a guy like that go to hell," She said soft, then muttered under her breath, " Maybe I can fix him." Lord Tourettes snapped.

" Alright you FUCKING BITCH, I'll have you know Blue is not going to hell and he's far from a fag and you can't " Fix Him"," Lord Tourettes snapped. A second nurse showed up and lead the other nurse away before she could reply. The first nurse walked off, the second returned.

" I'm sorry about her, let me take you to your boyfriend," She said softly. Lord Tourettes hummed angrily and followed, Blue sat hunched over on the little table. He looked up when the door opened and smiled sheepishly at Lord Tourettes.

" Is something wrong?" He asked when Lord Tourettes did not return the smile. The nurse sighed.

" Oh He's just mad at one of our nurses, I'm sure it'll be alright," she said quietly. Blue nodded. Lord Tourettes sighed and pulled Blue to his feet.

" Lets just go home," He grumbled. Blue hummed.


End file.
